Boundaries

One of the givens today is movable boundaries.
No, it is doubtful that there ever was a time when there were consistently defined and universal standards, expectations of behavior, acknowledgement what is right and what is wrong. Sure, there were clearly codified rules ranging from Moses to Hammurabi, but we are talking about social norms rather than legal/moral dictates. And today it has become more fuzzy (or at least more obviously so) than in the past.
Part of this comes from the seismic social changes that have happened in recent times. Traditional ways (even those not always acknowledged or adhered to) have been questioned, even outright discarded. Yes, there are those who, even though they honored these ways more in word than personal deed, have sought to turn back the clock to times that may have never really existed save in nostalgic memory. And when it proves impossible to put the toothpaste back in the tube, the blame game begins in earnest.
Does this mean we should give up any attempt to set appropriate boundaries? Of course we need to define who each of us may be and what we may be willing to do or tolerate from another; otherwise we fall into a psychological maelstrom of enmeshment between our issues and everyone else's. Nor should we give way to what one author referred to as "raging narcissism," where we only care for our own needs (paging Ayn Rand!)
One of the biggest tasks in most psychotherapy is dealing with boundaries. On one extreme is the client who resists leaving at the end of a session. On the other is the client who consistently arrives late (if at all) and wants to leave early. The spectrum runs from those who do not trust anyone at all to those who suffer greatly from the burdens of everyone else's problems. In addition, there are clients who want to know the therapist in every detail, and clients who come with their own expectations of the therapist.
So should we not seek any standards or accept and follow any ethical mores? There is some evidence that certain actions or behavior is universally condemned (incest, for example). And we all seem to have from childhood a sense of what is "fair" or not(butting in line.) Of course,  we have religious dicta that we carry from our faith, but that is where we get into the gray areas because they do not always mesh and can differ tremendously depending on how they are adhered to (do you eat pork?)
Before you begin thinking I have painted myself in a philosophical corner, let me suggest that the problem is not setting boundaries or what form of boundaries we set, but how rigidly we adhere to them. If we see our ethical/moral standards as goals rather than strict behavioral guidelines, we might be able live more honestly than we tend to do now. We might also save a great deal of emotional energy and anguish by not having to come up with rationalizations when we would not follow our own code of behavior, or feeling badly if we do. The point is having a goal to work toward, a sense of direction, something which might be at times beyond us but still whispers in our ear, come on! You can do better!