It goes way back, this need to have things our way. As infants, we are self-centered as much from survival instincts as from our narcissistic tendencies. One of the first steps in child development is our ability to distinguish ourselves from the rest of the world, to deal with the others around us as separate from us.
But there are grown-ups today (see, I'm giving them the benefit of the doubt) who still act as though the world revolved around them. Charming people, some of 'em, with a self-assurance and confidence that is quite alluring. They can be found in the arts, running businesses and especially in politics. (In fact I suspect that's part of the job description for politicians.)
These are the people (you know who you are!) who are never wrong. And when they are, it is someone else's fault. If fact, they react to being found wrong by doubling down and becoming wrong at the top of their lungs! The trouble is not with these charming people, but the collateral damage they leave in their wake: the abused, confused, misused folk who feel vaguely guilty and ashamed just for being in the path of such forces of nature! And that doesn't even take into consideration those who respond by taking on the mistaken doctrines of their abusers: the woman who defends her alcoholic abusive husband, the young person molested by an adult they still idolize, the soldier who, even after several tours of duty and traumatic experiences, tries to justify the mistaken military policy that put so many in harm's way.
The important step is to embrace our own errors, to admit that I might be wrong, you might be right. Sure, there are certain beliefs in everyone's life which end up as non-negotiable. But even there, can we accept that someone else can see things differently without being personally threatened by it, by needing to either convert them or eradicate them just so such a difference is no longer a dissonance in our world?
Of course, that's just my view. I could be wrong.
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